Is social media a curse/blessing?

 12:56

Ok so last night I got to open Instagram, Snapchat and everything came back to place. I don't understand exactly what the problem is and what do I need exactly? I don't know when I will come out of this problem or will it be with me forever? I am not able to understand what exactly the problem is? Why there is a person on my mind like forever and then there is my family who is with me but I am not able to fully involved with them. I have many duties to do ahead of me. But I am also not able to do it nicely. I don't know what the exact problem is and when I will get the solution to it? Thankfully now the idea of suicide might be but it is very less. So for the whole life, I would not like to end my life thankfully. But this hurting phase is too bad. I mean like I have got a good life including friends, family everything but still why I can't be happy from the inside. I don't understand what the problem is and what will be the solution. Right now I have to finish my coursework of Cloud Computing from my master's studies which I kind of don't want to do and also I am not able to do it easily.

14:36

I don't know what is happening? I mean like many thoughts coming in my mind which are not right as per the norms of society. It is definitely wrong. So now what could I do to divert it to the good aspect? I am trying my best to do in my life by focusing on the good aspects of life.

15:10

Why the hell my life revolves around thinking about that person who is no more there for me? I mean like they do not care anymore about us. It is tough times, this pandemic is also there. It does bother so much but more than that there is one thought that going around in the mind which is disturbing. When will I get the solution? Hope this gets over soon. I mean like I have a good life but why I can't be happy. I try my best to make others happy but there is nothing much that makes me happy from the inside.

19:23

I don't know one thing how to know if we are right or not? Hope I can get the solution from anywhere. We see so many quotes or lines on the internet and everywhere which feels true but I am like a totally different person from it and giving many chances to anyone. This must be felt like a self-oriented person which is not wrong but it can get selfish at a point which we could not know and that is wrong. So I want to check myself. I know that my intention is good from one point of view, but we are living in a society where there are few norms and everything which needed to be followed