Welcome to the Fictional World of Aditya Pooji Chauhan(through stories, questions, statements, etc.)

 I was talking with a person on Snapchat since the last month. It was a girl claiming to know me from the UK. She portrays herself as a person from LinkedIn I checked the profile the details were not matching. Now after a month all of a sudden removed me as a friend. I don't know the reason but I get emotional and sensitive which is very less as compared to past experiences. As a part of this, I could not see others that I am having. I have attached myself with Bigg boss or movies through which trying to be busy. Also at work, I have done great and am ready to do more. But for getting a luxurious life for the family I need so much money which I want to earn in some proper way and yes definitely followed by social service. Well, they say for giving someone something you should be having such a thing present with you. Hopefully, I get it soon. I am trying to work on YouTube but not sure if I could make much of it. Also trying to be busy by watching Youtube videos of different vlogger...

 To chose between everything is difficult. Today by mistake I posted on a broadcast list with a number of a person. Therefore I received many messages saying who is it? Else before I had posted a greeting then no one had replied back. This is tough. Feeling alone sometimes hurts and sleeping the whole day and awakening late at night all by myself is okay. But in the morning I don't have anything to be done that brings joy to me and peace. This way I at least be consumed and a little bit happy. If in that also parents or bhai sees me they tease me that you be happy while doing this and together you are not. Therefore it is like I am feeling hurting or sad every time and cannot solve any issue it. Also, I feel very badly many times that how the other person will react especially girls. In boys, I can be stubborn and can curse them. But for girls from the childhood my mother has taught me that you cannot say anything bad or wrong even though they have done anything wrong. I don't ...

 I feel low whenever a colleague, does not respond to me or give a proper answer to me. Especially ladies I have been a very good person to their hurts. It is my thinking that way. Then sometimes when I talk later with them, I am okay with it. Dont know why this thing keeps on repeating and just doesn't stop. I have been mentioning this thing in all previous blogs as well. I think I will need to discuss this with my OT friend, who has been helping me for a long time now. He gives me practical solutions to me. Hopefully, he will solve this thing as well. I am a very sensitive and emotional person. Let's see. I try my best to interact with all but still, they are not good much. I want to see anything which is good and makes me happy. This thing has been making me feel bad for a long time.

 The real attachment is with the videos or movies right now and hopefully, there will be some final results where it can be peaceful and happy with everything. Dont know what is the exact thing and when it will get solved. Hopefully one day there is some solution. Manifesting something may solve but don't know how and what to think. Yes, I know that there will be lots of money around so that I can provide luxury to my family who has done a lot for me. I try to fit in with them but due for some reason cannot make it through. Since childhood, I have been struggling with many things like toilet problems and sadness and I have come far with results. I am not able to figure out what is there exactly I am looking for. Also at work, the struggle is real when I am giving my 300-400% whereas in return there is very less. Still, I am out there giving my all to many but they are kind of jealous or something. Every day when I woke up there is some loneliness and getting sad over that person wh...

 Ok why this is always tough, I have been doing nothing but still, it feels sad. The other person doesn't care about it and I do not hold any place in their mind. Why I am like always thinking of them even though knowing that I am nothing to them. They have their own life and people around them. Why am I like this? Right now also I kept thinking of them. I have gone through many things and learned many. I have tried a lot of different things. At last counting from 1 to 100 also helps. But still, I cannot feel happy with my family. I have attached myself to work or watching videos or movies at night. But my mind hurts during the day if I am not busy with any work. While if any of these is physical work to be done which is given by my family or anyone I cannot do it. I do not like it. Today I am very good compared to my past. Yes, I do have a home, food everything with me but still not happy. I am an empathetic person who is out there for others and helping but still at last end up b...