Vlogs

00:32

Watching vlogs makes me so much happy from the inside which I try my best to feel around my family but I am unable to. But I try my best that I can bring happiness to their face. So recently I am trying to get attach to the vlogs so that it doesn't hurt me because I see it late, I mean like I will be watching 2 vlogs before today's so that I can watch every day. I wait for it for the whole day so that I can fight with any situation in my life and then I can watch it and be happy forgetting everything behind. While watching I do forget kind of everything leaving behind the sadness and all, worldly attachment and everything as well. I know this might be wrong but for now, this is what I like and I am being happy about it.

So these are the three youtube channel vlogs that I watch on daily basis:

1. Sourav Joshi Vlogs

2. Flying Beast

3. Mumbiker Nikhil

I get happy seeing them living life very happily though facing many problems in their daily life. Though the problem might be different but still especially the kids or pets in the vlogs makes me so happy. Because I would say that "The kids and the animals are the purest and most real."

14:21

So what is the exact problem? I cannot understand it. Maybe I am quite free right now that's why I keep getting disturbed with the person that kind of hang me dry after some time. The person is always there in my mind no matter how good or exciting thing I am doing in my life. Thanks to my family especially my mom who has trained me not to take the help of drugs or alcohol or like things to escape from the sorrow of life which are just nothing. But still, I have this bad habit which is a kind of addiction for me. But it is very low. I have tried escaping from it through playing games like PUBG, watching vlogs, etc. I have tried many things from escaping from these things thinking but sometimes nothing works. Is it my problem or the problem of the surrounding ones like my family with whom I cannot get involved effortlessly and be happy? I am a very happy person from the inside out but I cannot around the ones I have. I try my best to be happy with everyone. I think I am a kind person because mostly I am thinking good of others and forgive everyone for whatever the mistake might be because I empathise with everyone understanding them that why they must be doing it.

14:48

I don't feel like eating. It doesn't feel much good. I have to try to divert my mind through watching web series or vlogs or any videos in which I can get fully involved. I don't know why I keep waiting for the person to reply or contact us through any means us whereas they are quite happy with their life. I don't understand why I expect them to contact us whereas we know that it would never be happening but you got so much attached to it and expect so much that the person will contact you. Thankfully I have locked the social media and the password is with my elder brother with whom only it can be opened. I mean like I can open it in my laptop but that hurt feeling is not coming through it so that is fine. The person will be there with you for some time only, I mean like so much involved with you and like. But after some time they get involved with their life. They do have their priorities but for some time only they are fully involved with you. Then they move on which actually must as per seeing from their point of view. But as the sensitive person I am, it might be wrong. Dont know. All I am trying to be happy with what I have. I am trying my best to do the work which needed to be done. But I am not able to do it. Dont know why but I just don't like it and I am trying my best to do it. Also, the thing which I like and can get involved in doesn't seem feasible. Hope everything good soon.